Single.

The Christmas Season seems to bring out the fact that yes, I am SINGLE. Evidently, everyone else has a problem with it but ME. INCLUDING my thirteen year old JAIL BAIT neighbor.

My neighbor is probably about thirteen. Okay, maybe sixteen, but NO MORE. He yells across the courtyard the other day and says, "HEEYY!" "Has anyone told you thank you recently? 'Cause I just wanted to thank you for doing your part to make the world a more beautiful place!"

ALSO. I Am NOT ENGAGED.
Three of my friends just got engaged. On Christmas Day. Seriously. I went to an engagement party the day after Christmas and was cornered by a mutual acquaintance, who may or may not have been hitting the holiday nog a bit too hard......

"So......when are we going to have an engagement party for YOU?"

"..........when a man PROPOSES to me. And there has been NO PROPOSAL. No man. No proposal."'

".............Oh."

At that same party, a sweet old woman from my church approaches me:

"Have you thought about that guy?"

"Which guy?"

"Oh, you know! That guy! He's tall and has dark hair and he's on Facebook!"

I tried explaining to her that I have many male friends who have dark hair and are on Facebook, but she would have nothing of it.











I'm secretly terrified she is setting me up with my thirteen year old neighbor.